“No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening - it’s painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way” (Hebrews 12:11).
I spent the morning in the woodshed with Jesus. I knew I had better get my sorry self there as quickly as possible when I screamed at my six-year-old this morning for spilling Fruit Loops all over the kitchen floor. Based on my response to my son, I knew that getting away for some time with the Lord was the top priority for my day. So off I went the Prayer Room at a church down the road.
“Dear Lord,” I began, closing my eyes, “I thank you for..”
Repent for your anger.
Well, this is the point at which the Prayer Room did indeed become the woodshed (i.e., I needed a whipping, okay?) as the Lord began to show me several things that have been building up in my heart these last few days.
The longer God and I talked, the lighter my heart felt. Once I repented for all the junk, the Lord and I got to some of the root stuff.
The root stuff for me is some pretty overwhelming sadness about some friends who have walked away from the Lord. I am deeply grieving about this right now. I am crying at night with Hugh once the kids go to bed. We are praying together daily about it. But I still feel this weight of heaviness as I try to figure out how to leave these people at His throne.
I’m not doing a very good job of it, though - and it is shows when I yell at my precious son. This is not fair to him and not what God wants for me in my parenting.
Even though I am sad about these situations, I need to give my friends back to Jesus. I must do this for many reasons, one of which is so that I can focus on my children. I have had to lay down some people who are pretty important to me, and I guess it’s time to do it again. I have to trust that the Lord loves them more than I do and then realize that it is not my job to live in grief.
Lord, you cry over your children when they walk away from you. I pray you would move in the hearts of your prodigal sons and daughters. I trust you to do this and, in the meantime, to help me to focus on my primary ministry right now - my children. Amen.
give your friends back to Jesus, pray for them. but release yourself from the turmoil it is causing you — we don’t want satan to take a stronghold — you know that is what he is trying to do. lift your friends to Jesus!